Albuquerque – I’m not sure how I feel about you

19 Oct

The fire burning on the mountain is a little scary.  But looking at the mountains every morning is amazing!

It’s been a trippy, crazy, and not-quite-over ride since returning home from Prague.  Though not in my original plan, I have been back in New Mexico for just over a week now.   I have managed to accumulate 3 job offers and still have one on the way.  I also have another that I haven’t heard from, that I’m expecting soon.

Who’d a thunk it.   I have options.

Though I am grateful I didn’t just take the first thing that came along, I am finding it to be a far more of a challenge then I had ever considered, having options.  I have been working with a couple companies for some time to get to the point of even getting the offer.   In fact, the reason I have so many is because the first one took so long to get to this point and I couldn’t handle not knowing if I was going to get the job or not.  I don’t do well with being dangled.

I have this incredible sense of loyalty that I fear often taints my decisions.   One company has really nice people, a really nice school, but took THE Longest time to get back to me; which means I’ve been working with them for 3 weeks and just now got their official offer.  But, that sense of loyalty says, “You have to go with them, you’ve been talking with them for the longest time”.  It’s a very decent offer, but if it takes this long to get anything done, then……..?

A different part of me says, “Go with this one, they have the best benefit package and God knows you could use some good insurance”.   And of course there’s the third part of me that says, “Best offer, not a great place, you need the money right now, not the safety”.

What’s a girl to do?  Loyalty, benefits, or money with a scare?


Multiple nights a week I have been up until 2-3am with interviews from various Asian countries.  I have had trouble staying asleep after 4am.  But YES, I have finally been able to sleep the last few days.  Thank goodness, and I’m doing it without medication!   I am using these meditation soundtracks and whether I’m just in a meditation coma or actually asleep, I don’t care, I feel so much better in the morning.  Sleep makes all the difference in the world!

I have moved again.  I’m staying at mama’s until I leave for the other side of the world.  It’s like a constant state of movement that just solidifies that Albuquerque is not where I belong.  I don’t belong here, I never have and it’s time to find out where it is I do belong.  How do I do that?  Get out there and explore!

I send many thanks to my adopted mother, aka mama.  I am not sure where I’d be without her.  Her home is and will always be the safest place I know.  AND  it has a Jacuzzi tub and a 4 person steam shower with three shower heads and a fully tiled bench all the way around.   How could I possibly go wrong here?

It helps that mama is a Shaman.  I can work with her and get some guidance in this job hunt.  It is difficult and taxing, mostly because I know I will be happy wherever I teach, but how will I know which one will be most beneficial to my goals and future?

Shaman magic, that’s how.

I will let you all know as soon as I know the where’s and when’s of my future employment.




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