Today, this morning, my heart is heavy. My soul is crying. Every place I go, people harm each other. The -ism’s abound. Racism, sexism, ageism, etc. The historic ruling method of betterism is as rampant today as it has always been.
I am better than you. My god is better than yours. My house is better, my land is better, my job is better, my skin color is better. My army is better than yours. My views are better than yours. And so the Pendulum swings.
One side getting pulled up, having maximum potential. And as he comes crashing down at those below him, he meets resistance. The other side demands, cries out that they must be equally high!
And they are right. But, if they only want to be equally high on a Pendulum that swings back and forth, with brute force in the middle as they meet, only transferring energy from side to side. No one wins. Equality will never be found.
We HAVE to stop the Pendulum. We have to get off the ride.
On this ride, no one gets to be equal in anything except their turn at fear.
We are passengers on the Divide and Conquer Pendulum, throwing insults and violence as we careen back and forth on the fear ride.
And this isn’t even a fair assessment. White Privilege makes one side heavier. White Male Privilege makes it even heavier.
The Pendulum is only being swung from one direction, knocking into everything else, causing only chaotic energy at the bottom, enabling a few to get pushed upward on the other side of all those in the middle, who are just getting smashed into, feeling the energy moving through them, with no way to get anywhere with it.
All the -ism’s are different ends on the same ride, different end balls getting smashed into by the same originating force.
Many people say I can’t understand what it is to be a black American. That is undeniably true for the most part. But, as a woman, I can understand more than you give me credit for. All women, regardless of color know harassment just by being women. We know the victim blaming that will come no matter how we were dressed or behaving. We know the fear and risk of deciding to walk down a street alone.
No, I cannot completely understand. I cannot. I know that as well. My status as a white woman has given me privilege, that even as much as I understand, still provides me with more just because I am white.
But I can and do empathize with a great deal of understanding. And because of that, I also know that the only way for all of us to get equality, is to stop swinging the Pendulum. To get off the damn ride. To refuse to play. To STOP killing, harming, insulting, and believing in the betterisms.
YES, it is far more dependent on those who have the privilege to stop swinging their balls. I know. I fight for it all the time. I get into discussions regularly with people who say “I’m not racist. I’m not privileged. I have black friends. I treat girls well.” Who also catcall and judge every girl walking down the street. Calls anyone or anything that doesn’t behave they way the want a “nigger”. People who turn their backs on, or blame Person A when a tragedy strikes, because Person A should have ….. People who blame ALL of this group because a few did something horrific. People, everyday people, riding the ride, comfortable in their discomfort because it’s what they know.
We need to get uncomfortable. We need to be willing to throw away Betterism first. Once that one is gone, we can show that all the other ism’s are a form of betterism, and they too can be discarded. Then, can we look at each other as equal. Equal in our decision to get off the ride. Equal in our humanity. Equal in our choice to stop giving our money and time to fear of not being ‘as good as’. Because, ‘not as good as’, is a strand of betterism, it’s the fear of not being enough, of being unworthy, of not being significant, of being deprived. Betterism hits all the basic human fears. And all negative actions begin in one of these fears.
We need to be brave, face our fears, be accepting of each other, stop, JUST STOP needing to be better than in order to feel self-worth. And for Pete’s sake, STOP KILLING EACH OTHER. STOP BEING VIOLENT.
I support the #BlackLivesMatter movement in part because I have a black son, but more importantly because any mother of a black child shouldn’t feel guilt for having had their child, shouldn’t feel fear every time they leave the house, and shouldn’t have to go to their child’s funeral because someone else couldn’t face their own fears, and chose to be violent instead.
#noonedeservesviolence NO ONE.
We have had amazing leaders who proved that peaceful protest is better than war, better than violence, unites instead of disenfranchises, and gets things done quicker. When the aggressor feels there is justification in being aggressive, it only strengthens the viciousness of the cycle. Peaceful unity, standing together in all of our understanding that we don’t really know how to do it just right because we’ve never had an example of how to before. All we know is that we want to give our children a future that doesn’t involve the Pendulum; a future where we have stepped off the ride; a future where we are equal, blessed in our diversity, but equal in our humanity.
My hope and prayer is that enough people feel the same, that we can collectively get off the ride quickly.
Love and light to you all.